Band Aid Pick Up Lines

| May 10, 2012

Thomas asks…

Anyone else here dealing with Dermatillomania (compulsive skin picking)?

I am a compulsive skin-picker. I pick the loose skin around my cuticles and my lips, and I’ve been doing this for years. Like, I just have to make my skin smooth. I don’t care how much it hurts or bleeds or anything. Anyway, I was wondering if anyone else here does this. If you do, to what extent do you do it? For me, most of my fingers are healing now, except my thumb which is pretty much mutilated halfway down on the left side. That’s pretty bad considering it started at my cuticle… Also, how can I hide it? Because when other kids at school see it they say something along the lines of, “Oh my god! what happened to your fingers?” and I never know what to say to that so I say, “Oh, uh, I don’t know. It was like that, nothing happened…” I’ve tried a band-aid but I can never keep it on that long because I just feel like I really have to pick my skin. Also, in class sometimes my thumb starts gushing blood from me picking at it and I don’t want to go up in front of the class for a tissue or ask for a band-aid because the teacher will ask what happened and I don’t want to say I did it to myself. So I guess all I really want to know is how I can stop. If you do this how do you deal with it? Oh, and I’m fourteen if your wondering.

answers:

If you want to remove this, you could try this free healing method

David asks…

Can anyone write a metaphore poem?

It has to be at least up to five lines and something like this below
My family lives inside a medicine chest
Dad is the super sized band aid, strong and powerful but not always effective in a crisis mom is the middle size tweezer which pokes and picks and pinches. David is the single small aspirin on the third shelf sometimes ignored.

Can you help me with another one like this i have a mom thats over protected dad strick but there for you and a brother whos always yelling and i am laid-back and calm it has to be a comparison of something

answers:

You could do something like your family being like a book; maybe your mom is the cover that protects the rest of the family, your dad could be the index that is very detailed but you always need it, and so on. Or, maybe a closet or something. Just think about it!

Paul asks…

do you know more things that will turn a sane person insane?

you have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them

the person behind you in the supermarket runs his trolley into the back of your ankle

the elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on

there’s always a car riding your tail when you’re slowing down to find an address

you open a can a soup and the lid falls in

its bad enough that you step in dog mess, but you don’t realize it till you walk across you living room rug

the tiny red string on the band aid wrapper never works for you

there’s a dog in the neighborhood that barks at everything

you can never put anything back in a box the way it came

you drink from a can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette

you slice your tongue licking an envelope

your tire gauge lets out half the air while you’re trying to get a reading

a station comes in brilliantly when you’re standing near a radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away

there are always one or two ice cubes that wont pop out of your tray

you was a garment with a Kleenex in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint

you set the alarm on your digital clock for 7pm instead of 7am

the radio station doesn’t tell you who sang that song

you rub on hand cream and cant turn the door to get out

people behind you in a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up

your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire
you cant look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don’t know how to spell it

you have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you’re just browsing

you had that pen in your hand only a second ago and now you cant find it

you reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up

answers:

Yes… How about these.
1. You keep answering questions on Yahoo Answers and your answers are good.
2. The same questions keep coming up over and over. They drive you nuts!!!

3. You keep answering questions on Yahoo Answers and you think your answers are great.
4. The same questions keep coming up over and over. They drive you nuts!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Joseph asks…

a thousand ways to annoy it is HILARIOUS!?

How To Annoy People In An Elevator
Ask, “did you hear that cable snapping sound?”
Call the psychic hotline from you cell phone, and ask if they know what floor you’re on.
Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, “That’s mine!”
Hum the theme from Mission Impossible with yours eyes darting around the elevator.

Ways to Annoy Public Bathroom Stallmates
Cheer and clap loudly every time someoe breaks the silence w/ a bodily function noise.
Drop a marble and say, “Oh shit! My glass eye!”
Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, “May I borrow a highlighter?”
Say, “Uh oh, I knew I shouldn’t have put my lips on that.”

General Ways to Annoy People
Announce when you’re going to the bathroom.
Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. “I’m Bob, nice to meet you…” “PROVE IT!”)
ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.

Ways To Annnoy Your Roommate
Become a mime. Nothing is more annoying than a mime.
Ask your roommate if your family can move in “just for a couple of weeks.”
Buy some turtles. Paint numbers on their backs. Race them down the hall.
Chain yourself to your roommate’s bed. Get him/her to bring you food.

Ways To Annoy People In The Computer Lab
Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.
Light candles in a circle around your terminal before starting.
Play “Pong” for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.
Try to stick a Nintendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn’t work, get the supervisor.

Ways to Annoy People on the Beach
Wear t-shirt that says, “I’m the coolest dude on this pathetic beach. No autographs please.”
Ask everyone you meet, “Hot enough for you?”
Sing the “Barney” theme song as loud as you can.
If you see kids building a sand castle, say, “That’s not a real castle!”

Ways to Annoy People At An Amusement Park
Leave large gaps in between you and the people in front of you while waiting in line.
Offer people money for their spots in line…MONOPOLY money.
Find someone to tell your life story to.
Whisper right in someone’s ear, “I know what you did last summer.”

Ways To Annoy People On The Subway
Stand in front of the doorway and glare at people when they try to get by.
Constantly ask people for directions.
Don’t take a shower for a month.
Tell the people your problems. They really want to know.

Ways to Annoy People in the Office
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that.
Email your boss the message: I know what you did last vacation.
Page yourself over the intercom. (Don’t disguise your voice.)
Schedule meetings for 4:14 pm.

Ways to Torture the Pizza Guy
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
Ask if you they can put food color in the cheese.
Ask them to not put a band-aid on it this time or you will sue.

How To Annoy People On An Airplane
Call the stewardess “nurse”.
Don’t use deoderant, then “accidently” stick your armpit in someone’s face
If someone has a bad toupee, whack it off.
No matter what the meal choices are, demand rice-a-roni.

Ways To Annoy Your Professors
Instead of taking notes, do an abstract painting during every class. Call the paintings things like, “Professor Acting Like Mr. Know-It-All” or “Idiot Who Doesn’t Know What The Hell He’s Talking About.” Give the paintings to your professor as gifts.

Ways To Annoy A Cop
Hey, you must’ve been doin’ 125 mph to keep up with me!
You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

Annoying Things To Do In A Discount Superstore
Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
Move “Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.

Annoying Things To Say To Other People
Would you hold this messy kleenex for me?
Would you look at the size of the hair I just yanked out of my nose!
Can you believe they only gave me three years for killing my own sister?!
I’ve just been treated for tapeworms.

Ways to Annoy Santa Claus
Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill.
Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with Easter eggs.
While he’s in the house, cover the top of the chimney with barbed wire.

How To Annoy The IRS
If your very unfortunate and have to pay taxes use a two or three party check.
If you send 2 checks they’ll have to staple your unsightly envelope to your half destroyed form.
Sign your name in ink on every page. Any signature has to verified and then date stamped.

How To Be Annoying At A Funeral
Tell the widow that you’re the deceased’s gay lover.
Ask the widow to give you a kiss.
Drive behind the widow’s limo and keep honking your horn.
Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit.

Ways to Annoy Usenet (internet newsgroup) Users
Post a message asking how to post messages.
Post recipes on rec.pets.cats.
Follow up a 200-line post to add only your signature.
Flame yourself, and complain to your own postmaster.

Annoying Things To Do At A Drive Through Window
Specify that this order is “To Go”.
At midnight, ask if you are too early for Breakfast.
Laugh loudly when asked if you would like fries with your order.

Ways To Be Annoying In A Mall
Sprint up the down escalator.
Ask for red-tinted lenses at the optometrist.
Change every TV in the electronics department to a station showing “Saved by the Bell”.
Put weird backgrounds on store computers when people aren’t looking.

Annoying Things to Do at the Bowling Alley
Rent all the lanes, don’t bowl.
Wear a baseball uniform, bowl sidearm.
Sit in your lane and heckle others with a bullhorn.
Run around sprinkling “magic fairy dust” on everyone’s balls.

How to Annoy (Get Rid Of) A Blind Date
Hold a debate. Take both sides.
Repeat every third third word you say say.
Ask the people at the neighboring table for food from their plates.
Ask your date how much money they have with them.

Ways To Annoy People In Restaurants
Two Words: Food Fight.
Play with your food; to add effect, act like it’s a special performance for the people at the next table.
Whenever anyone leaves their seat at another table, put some particularly messy peice of food on their seat.

Ways To Annoy People At The Movies
Throw popcorn in the air and yell, “It’s snowing!”
Go, “Oooooh…” whenever anyone kisses.
Clap when the good guy gets killed.

Annoying Things To Do At School
leave a Snickers bar in the toilet.
Draw pictures of your professor in the margins.
End the paper with “This paper will self-destruct in 10 seconds”.
Support your thesis with quotes from your VCR manual.

How To Annoy Your Waiter
Eight hour lunch; two dollar tip.
Ask, “Excuse me, are you a really bad singer, or a really bad actor?”
After he describes each special, you shout, “Stinks!”
Whenever he walks by, cough and mutter, “Minimum wage.”

How To Annoy Your Parents
Paint your windows.
Boil ice cream.
Join Hell’s Angels by mail.
Redecorate your garage.

Ways to Annoy a Yankee (Northerner)
Take your own sweet time when doing ANYTHING.
Pronounce all one-syllable words with two.
Refer to every soft drink as a Coke.
Tell them you don’t have an accent, they do.
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How To Annoy Your Driver
Always tell the driver to slow down or speed up.
Every time you see a car pulling out, yell to the driver “Watch it!”
Point to the right and tell the driver to make a left.

How To Annoy Other Drivers
Keep your brake light blinking by keeping one foot on the brake pedal at all times.
If you are on vacation and you see any sort of wildlife, stop in your lane to take a lot of pictures.
Women are encouraged to put on their make-up while driving.

Annoying Things To Do During A Job Interview
While shaking hands get into a heated thumb wrestling match.
Stick a piece of broccoli between your front teeth, smile a lot.
Demand that if hired you want desk plate that reads, “Big Kahuna.”

Annoying Things To Do In A Swimming Pool
Hit strangers with your flutter board.
Laugh at fat people in swimsuits.
Ask people if they have seen your pet shark.

Annoying Things to do at a Synagogue
Use the Jewish hat as a Frisbee
Bring popcorn and keep saying “i heard that religion got a good review”
Leave cookies and milk in the middle of the synagogue with a piece of paper that reads Santa
Ask people if they liked the passion

answers:

LOL

One thing you said that made me think… “Run around sprinkling “magic fairy dust” on everyone’s balls.”
Errmmm, yeah. That’d be kinda awkward going up to people asking “Can I spread my magic dust on your balls?”

John asks…

How do I fix my thumb? I bent it backwards.?

So, today I was playing ball with some friends. And I wasn’t paying attention so when I saw the ball come at me I tried to push it away but was a little too late and when I looked down I saw that my thumb nail ( which is really long and thick ) was bent all the way backwards. Enough so that it was bleeding tremendously and there was a thick white/red line when the nail was placed back. I even heard a crack/pop when my sister pushed it back.

I ran it under cold water and put a band-aid over it. But I can’t touch anything or put any pressure on it. Meaning, I can’t pick anything up at all. I wouldn’t mind it so much if it were my left hand-or another finger. But it’s my right, and I’m right handed.

I have school in two days and I don’t think I’ll be able to write or anything by then. It really hurts and it’s still bleeding.

Help? Anything you guys recommend I do to make it heal faster? Or for the pain to go away?

answers:

Go to the Emergency Room Now!!!!!!

Mandy asks…

Have you ever had a dream about The Beatles?

I have had a couple of repulsive ones O_O

I will tell the repulsive one last….

I had a dream that I was working behind a bar ( I am only 16! ) at some restaurant, and all the sudden I saw a big crowd of paparazzi waiting at the door, then all the sudden John Lennon comes bursting in ( as his younger self ) and signed autographs, then came up to the bar I was at. Then he asked for some sort of drink! I had no idea what kind of drink he was asking for, so I just gave him a beer, and he said thanks. Then he said in a sleezy kinda voice to me ” Heeyy, your kinda cute..” I was like ” Woahhh thats awesome, but weird “. Then after that I just said thanks, then John asked for some red wine, so I got him a glass of red wine, and my hand was still clasped around the wine glass so you grabbed my hand, while my hand was still around it, and drank some wine then kissed me on my lips! I was like ” Your breath smells like wine! ” and then thats all I can remember!

Then I had a dream that Ringo Starr was coming to my school so obvilousy we were in high school! Every started freaking out, and I kept going crazy, and screaming! In school I have no friends soo in my dream I had no friends. Like a week before Ringo was coming to school we had banners around the school that said stuff like RINGO WILL BE COMING TO SCHOOL IN A COUPLE OF DAYS!!!!!!! Then the day he came the banners said RINGO IS COMING TO SCHOOL TODAY!!!!!!!! So everyone started to freak, and scream, and line up at the school door. I was all the way in the very back of the line, and when Ringo came in he singed autorgaphs for everyone, and when he finally got down to me the school bell rang, and everyone ran to class except for Ringo, and I. Ringo didn’t even sign my autograph he just started to gaze at me! I fianlly just starting gazing at him so I could go along with it then I slapped him upside the head, and he got out of his little lalaland. He aplogized for doing it, and he said he just couldn’t help it, so then he slammed me up the lockers, and started to kiss me!!! Then he just walked off…..

I had a dream where I was riding my bike down the street then all the sudden my bike falls apart into a million pieces, and I am bleeding everywhere, and I can’t even get up! So some lady calls the ambulance, and when the ambulance comes George Harrison jumps out with his resuce team looking really cute, and young!! Then he whispers in my ear ” Everything will be alright. “, and then when I got to the hostpital, George had this HUGE like HUGE band-aid! It was as big as my body!!! So then George gentley picks me up, and wraps my whole body in the band-aid, and I couldn’t even move! So then for some reason George pins me on the wall with a nail!! Some how I am still alive, and then he said ” I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT!!!”, and he slaps me in the face, and starts being mean, and hitting, then he feels really bad, and terrible about it, and starts crying because he feels so bad for doing it! Then he takes me of the wall takes the band-aid off, and everything is healed! After the band-aid comes off he hugged me for like 5 minutes, and then he kissed my cheek!!

Okay……. here is the repulsive one………

I had a dream that Paul McCartney just asked to marry me and Paul was like in his 20′s, and we were on our honeymoon. At our honeymoon we were sitting in this room, and just out of no where Paul looks at me and says ” Hey wanna do it? ” I was like ” Okay! Sure! ” ( I would never say that in real life ). So then we did it hardcore! And he kept making out with me, and touching me in all the wrong ways! REALLY WRONG! And he kept running his fingers through my hair! It was sooo creepy!!! Then by the end of the dream I gave birth to a baby!!! It was sooo gross!!!! Ughhhh!!! It was sooo terrible!!! I mean I love Paul McCartney, but not like that!! I never want to have intercourse with him!!!!

answers:

No but that would be cool… I love their music!

Richard asks…

CLASSIC COUNTRY FANS,put on your THINKING CAPS…here comes some more CLASSIC TRIVIA…. R U READY ?

Pick the CORRECT answer~line to these CLASSIC COUNTRY SONGS…
1.IN AND OUT OF HONKY TONKS…
a.Drunk as a skunk
b.From one town to the next
c.Chasin women
d.Tasting diffrent brands of beer

2.I SANG DIXIE AS HE…
a.Covered his ears
b.Lined dance
c.Died
d.Cried

3.YEA I’M PROUD TO BE A ……
a.Lottery winner
b.Coal miners daughter
c.Drug free weed head
d.yahoo answerer

4.YOU’VE GOT A THING OR TWO TO LEARN ABOUT ME BABY CAUSE…
a.I’m really a man
b.I cleaned out your bank account
c.I’ve got aids
d.I ain’t takin it no more and i don’t mean maybe

5.IF YOU’RE GONNA PLAY IN TEXAS….
a.you have to be at least 21
b.You must wear cowboy boots and a hat
c.You gotta have a fiddle in the band
d.You must drive a red pick-up

6.A WHITE SPORTS COAT AND A …….
a.bag of bar-b-que potato chips
b.pink carnation
c.ticket to miami
d.new born puppy

answers:

Pick the CORRECT answer~line to these CLASSIC COUNTRY SONGS…
1.IN AND OUT OF HONKY TONKS…
B.From one town to the next

Line from Earl Thomas Conley’s “Fire and Smoke”

2.I SANG DIXIE AS HE…
C.Died

Dwight Yokum’s “I sang Dixie”

3.YEA I’M PROUD TO BE A ……
B.Coal miners daughter

Loretta Lynn “Coal Miner’s Daughter”

4.YOU’VE GOT A THING OR TWO TO LEARN ABOUT ME BABY CAUSE…
D.I ain’t takin it no more and i don’t mean maybe

Had to research this one… Patty Loveless – “Blame it on your lying cheating heart”

5.IF YOU’RE GONNA PLAY IN TEXAS….
C.You gotta have a fiddle in the band

Alabama’s “If you’re gonna play in Texas”

6.A WHITE SPORTS COAT AND A …….
B.pink carnation

Marty Robbins “A white sports coat”

Laura asks…

The well known packing list ;)!?

Okay Fair is in July. I have been perfecting this list for about a year. >. the purple breeches :D

Banding
comb
bands
quick braid
grooming apron
band separator

Show Touch-Up
white color touch-up
baby oil gel
pepi
hoof polish
baby wipes
hair spray
sleazy
tail bag
fly sheet/mask/boots
stable sheet
polo wraps
shipping boots
sponges

Grooming
hard brush
soft brush
vet wrap
hoof pick
clippers
sweat scraper
hose/hose head
fly spray & roll on fly spray
first-aid kit

Utility
duct tape
masking tape
scissors
chicago screws
leather strings
safety pins
scotch tape
sewing kit
glue sticks
sharpie
pens/pencils
notebook
hole puncher
tools
ladder
bungee cords
lock
chain
ziploc bags
garbage bags
light for stall
flashlight

Tack
number holder
girth
cinch
show saddle
saddle rack
english saddle
saddle covers
show bridle
bridle rack
english bridle
bridle bag
show saddle pad english
pad liner western
orange pad western
yellow practice pad
practice pad western
lunge line/whip/rope halter
nylon halter
lead rope
showmanship halter & lead

Personals
hair bands
hair brush bobby pins
mirror
bottled water
hand towels-dampened in ice
sunscreen
chap stick
hand wipes
cooler
chairs
rug for tack room
bug spray

Show Clothes
hair net
rain poncho
show shirt western show shirt & coat english
black jeans
breeches
purple practice breeches
chaps
hat black
hat tan
shiny belt
english boots
western boots
halter outfit
practice helmet
english helmet
western helmet
garment bag
necklace
rubber boots

Stall
water bucket
grain tub
hay bag
hay
grain
bucket hangers
broom
stall rake
shovel
shavings
stall sign
box fan
electric cords
mare magic
glucosamine

Mom
coggins
sunglasses
cash
camera(s)
white show book

Bathing
scrubby mits
mane & tail shampoo
body shampoo
bucket
whitening shampoo
baby powder
mixing stick (I mix baby powder and whitening shampoo for PeRfEcT white!)
@donald Have my own ;) love how you refer to it as crap! i do too *lol
yup I forgot wheel barrow splint boots and radio .
barrel (auto-correct .

answers:

Your forgetting to lease the tractor-trailer necessary to carry all this crap around.

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